Cultivating Goodness Within Our Children

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Shelf of classic children's books to be read cultivating goodness within our children.

A Child's Longing 'To Know'

As parents, we have a sincere desire in cultivating goodness within our children. Each child is unique from the start, as every parent knows. Some of my babies couldn’t get enough coddling, attention, and fussing over. Another desired only to be fed, bathed, dressed then given space as she had things to do. One young daughter was deeply interested in all things dinosaur while another immersed herself in pinky gauze, sequins and drama. While I couldn’t converse long enough with one little son, the other kept his thoughts and wishes deep inside sharing one-word answers at best. Along with the diverse personality and interests of all young souls, there is a commonality – the longing ‘to know’. We are made to know and we yearn to know from a young age.

The human soul stretches itself out to know.” – Aristotle

Children are Great Imitators

All learning begins with imitation and children are great imitators. The young observe and imitate their parents, siblings, teachers and characters in books. They will first imitate what they observe in their minds and then try it out for themselves. 

 “…and in this they differ from the other animals because they are the most imitative and produce their first acts of understanding by means of imitation; also all human beings take delight in imitations.” – Aristotle

This a wake-up call for us as parents in our deeply influential role. It also encourages us as nurturers to thoughtfully choose the resources we present to our children by practicing discernment and taking the opportunity to cultivate goodness. As stated earlier, children learn by imitation in their quest ‘to know’. What music are they exposed to, what are they watching on the screen, what storybooks are at hand? Let us specifically focus on the influence stories and storybooks have on a child’s voracious efforts to learn, imitate and make sense of their world.

Children Gather Information from Stories, an Opportunity for Cultivating Goodness

Children are attracted to stories. In fact, we all like stories. Stories introduce us to other lives, other worlds but, with a similarity that connects us. We learn of things that could happen and also things that could never happen as in fantasy or make-believe. However, both of these genres have a reality about them. Because each of us is also living a story, reading about other people, times, places and experiences is a profound way to learn beyond our own experience. When we begin a story, we wonder where it will take us, what will we learn, how will we be enlightened, is there good here?

Children are constantly gathering information about life as everything is new to them. They are at the beginning of their life story. What an extraordinary and exciting time to regularly experience and learn of things for the first time! It is an opportunity for cultivating goodness in our children, right from the start. Children naturally possess the gifts of awe and wonder. Their hearts and minds are receptive to deep learning. Awe and wonder are the immediate provocations of deep learning. These fresh early years gift a powerful opportunity to influence a child’s life for good.

In their quest to learn, children are drawn to things they don’t understand. When introduced to a character in a situation, they follow along with the choices and actions taken and in turn learn from them. 

“Children read a book about a sports hero and they long for glory. Children read about a fictional character and they are taught character qualities of courage, steadiness, determination, etc. Children can compare it to their own world. They can see it better, in a new context. It is fascinating.”  – C.S. Lewis

Fairy Tales Contain Comparisons

The best stories for children, including fairy tales, are those that contain comparisons. Tales that teach the range of things: good and evil, right and wrong, courage and cowardliness. They are stories of benefit because they teach truths. Truths such as – obtaining goodness comes at the cost of giving up something of value. The awareness that the opposite exists acknowledges there is a comparison. To learn without opposing values is a distortion of reality. The experience doesn’t offer children the opportunity to imitate. Fairy tales contain rich examples of comparison. Fairy tales are not always happy, they contain darkness but they also contain the contrast with good, beauty, and right. Fairy tales are profound for the conflicts are simply and clearly told.

“Since it is so likely that children will meet cruel enemies, let them at least have heard of brave knights and heroic courage.”  -C.S. Lewis

As invested parents, we aim to teach our children. A proper moral education includes both heart and head. Children want to know the goodness of things, the identity of things. Goodness is the identity of good things. Beginning in early childhood, teach your child by reading together from the best stories containing this identity. It satisfies their yearning to know, offers character traits, situations of comparison and captivates and stirs a child’s imagination. Regularly, beginning now and continuing on through the years, present your child with storybook heroes to emulate. The situations of what could be and should be will be presented for your child to capture the meaning of morality and anchor a moral imagination to build on, refer to and imitate. 

Cultivate Goodness by Reading from the Best Stories

It takes a long time, it is surely a lengthy process to learn the rules of life, to learn right from wrong and how to play the game well. Cultivate goodness in your child by choosing to read to them from the best stories. You will nurture their innate yearning to know of the identity and goodness of things. Good stories, including fairy tales, hold a wealth of goodness from which your child can learn from, refer to and imitate as they maneuver through the choices and pathways of life.

Note: This post is based on my notes from a children’s literature course from Hillsdale college with professors, Larry P. Arnn and Daniel B. Coupland. I thank them for their enlightenment and goodness. – Janet Meyer

Childhood Gem written in black on a white background with a gold star to the left

Mud Pies and Other Recipes by Marjorie Winslow

This child-sized, creative and inspiring playtime cookbook is a feast for the eyes as well as the imagination. Recipes highlighted by Erik Blegvad’s charming pen and ink illustrations encourage garden exploits from a gentler time. Whether serving your teddy bear Mud Puddle Soup or Freshly Picked Flower Hors d’oeuvres for a doll’s tea party, all ingredients are conveniently found in your own garden.

a book cover entitles Mud Pies and Other Recipes with a red binding and garden tools in the illustration. Good Books like this cultivates goodness in children.
Janet Nicole Meyer

Janet Nicole Meyer

The founder and author of Golden Days at Home preschool curriculum savors all opportunities to play and travel with her now grown children. She and her husband hike, bike and enjoy living on a stream in Boulder, Colorado with their elderly English Mastiff, Roxy.

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